Sunday, February 21, 2010


When we look forward to something and then it doesn't turn out the way we expected it can cause grief.

I had been so excited about this women's retreat with the ladies from my church for a month or more - but after only getting 2-3 hours of sleep Friday night, and getting sick Saturday morning I should have stopped expecting it to be better. I should have admitted that it was too physically hard for me to sit in chairs without my heating pad, and to be so tired. I should have gone home before I did. As it turned out I made it until about 7 last night when I called my husband almost in tears and asked him to come and take me home. The horrors of feeling so physically ill and in so much pain exhausted me. I was in bed til after noon today and am going back as soon as I finish this post. I don't know how long it will take for me to recover from this weekend.

Several times during the last 2 days my eyes have welled with tears and my heart felt such deep grief. I realized that i probably could have saved myself some of this grief if I would have been humble enough to bring my heating pad into the sessions and even been upfront with the leaders about the fact that it is hard for me to sit in chairs like that - or that I would like a room to myself if possible to get more sleep. So much of the grief could have been avoided if I would have just planned with my limits in view rather than wishing that i was just like everyone else.

If our expectations are more realistic and prepared I believe that we can have less grief over the disappointments of our health.

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