My husband is a hero.
The spouses of those in chronic pain often are from what I have seen. I am sure there are plenty who aren't or who have abandoned ship by now - but I for one am extremely thankful for the ones (and in particular the One) who have stayed. The staying in itself may be seen by some as heroic - when faced with doctor visit after doctor visit, disappointment after disappointment, hospitalization after hospitalization ... so many things that no one would call enjoyable. My husband finds moments of joy in everything. We have been laughing all day long at the comical name of my new gastroenterologist doctor who we met this morning. A simple thing, but which makes moments sitting in waiting rooms more fun. He brings companionship to the most boring and painful times of my life. But this alone doesn't make him a hero.
Tonight, after a long day I was already in bed, I told him that I had forgotten to write in this blog and how I felt like I had let myself down for not doing what I set out to do with writing every day this year. I said., "it's ok that I don't write today .. right?" "NO, you need to write" was his answer! Some might think that is horribly mean of him to say to his wfe who was already laying down in bed. But I saw right through that. He knows that I need the feeling of belonging of being needed, of making a difference ... and silly as it may seem, this blog is one thing that does that for me. He knows that I am well enough to type tonight and that doing so will help me get up tomorrow with my head held high feeling like I have purpose in life (I know all of this sounds lofty for this simple blog ... but it's true). He is my hero because he believes in me and pushes me when I can't do it myself.
So, to my sweet Husband, and all the spouses of the chronically in pain out there .. thank you for being the hero you are.